You know you’re not done having kids when…

You're not done having kids if

You’re not done having kids when…

When my husband and I were dating, the conversation of kids came up naturally. We talked about how many babies we wanted, how many boys versus girls, and possible names. Even before we were married, we knew that we wanted children. I wanted four, he wanted two. So, we agreed on three.

After our second, we kept debating whether or not to have more children. I no longer wanted four kids. We were really unsure that we wanted to continue. Expanding our family was going to be a big decision. It meant bigger cars, possibly bigger house, and a greater need for daycare. But as I toyed with the question, I realized that maybe I wasn’t done, for sure. Or maybe I was.

If you can relate to any of these than you may not be done having children either, just saying.

You’ve saved all of your baby clothes, just in case.

Do you have loads of baby clothes that you’ve been meaning to give away but somehow still holding on to them “just in case”?  You don’t want to start all over right? I still have three tubs of baby boy clothes from NB to 3 years! I’ve been meaning to go through them and keep the ones I really like (for sentimental reasons) and give the rest away but just haven’t gotten around to it because what if I happen to get pregnant? I need to be prepared, amiright?

You still have baby names in the back of your head.

Do you have a few baby names that you just LOVE but you’re not going to tell anyone because what if you happen to have another baby? If you have those names locked down, then you might not be done having children. I still have one boy’s name and two girl’s names locked, I hope that doesn’t mean at least two more for me!

Making it permanent scares you.

Have you had a tubal ligation? Has your husband had a vasectomy? If you are hesitant about making it permanent, than you may not be done having children. I will not get a tubal ligation unless I have another C-section (which means having another baby). My husband says he won’t get a vasectomy unless I get a tubal ligation. I can’t figure out if it’s the fear of the surgery or if it’s the fear of permanence that is keeping us from getting it done.

You keep asking your husband, “Are we done yet?”

Does this question pop-up a lot? I went through a month’s phase of asking my husband every week if we were done having kids. I phrased it differently each time and never got a straight forward answer from him. I wasn’t sure if he was done but was afraid to tell me, or if he was unsure himself. Either way, it took a long time to come to the conclusion that we were done, for now.

You “forget” about how difficult pregnancy, labor and child bearing can be.

Do you conveniently forget how difficult and tiring pregnancy can be, and down play the lack of sleep during those first years of childhood? Then you might not be done having kids. My first pregnancy was great, but my second was a little rough. I was really nauseous and constipated, he was breech, I had a few scares and I had to have a c-section but I keep telling myself it wasn’t that bad. I mean, other people have it worse, right?

You still “PIN” baby tips and articles on Pinterest.

Are you still pinning baby stuff? Then maybe you aren’t done having kids. That baby vibe and lust seems to just linger. I found myself pinning baby girl stuff  just in case I have a girl down the road, I want to remember that outfit or nursery décor if it happens. I also kept pinning baby tips and tricks for breastfeeding, new ways to make baby food and more about cloth diapers “just in case”. There was so much good info and great ideas, I didn’t want to forget them. If you do this too, you’re probably not done having kids.

You ask your other children, “would you want another brother or sister?”

Have you asked your kids how they would feel if they had another sibling? Not that it would influence my decision whether or not my children wanted more siblings, but I was curious to know. For the longest time, my oldest son was firm that he did NOT want another brother or a new sister. Recently he told me, he wants a sister.

You Google what it’s like to have {this many} children.

If you’ve done this, I would definitely hold off on anything permanent. Do you ever wonder what it’s really like with two, three, or four children? I will admit to searching for answers here from real life mothers. I also found myself asking my friends with three kids how their life was. If you really want to know and go as far as Googling and YouTubing this topic then you’re probably not done having kids.

 

Can you relate with any of these? Are you done having children? Let me know your experiences below!

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