Third baby shower? Why I am having one and you should too

Third Baby Shower

“If her kids are that close together and she wants a shower, she is selfish, she has everything already so why does she need a shower?”

As I was looking up ideas for having a third baby shower (sprinkle) for baby number three, 80% of the comments I read were full of judgement and negativity. I never realized that it was so taboo or “not good etiquette” to have a third baby shower. I’m almost 30 weeks pregnant and it’s that time to start thinking about how I want to celebrate my third baby. Naturally, you celebrate with a baby shower. But having THIRD baby shower?

Traditionally, baby showers are meant for the first baby only. If mothers were to have another shower for her subsequent children, she was viewed as greedy and selfish. Sure she may have teeth marks on her old crib or stained fabric on her swing, but they still work and she should have everything she needs. As if mom-shaming hasn’t gone far enough. Why aren’t you breastfeeding? Why are you breastfeeding? What formula are you using? Oh, you’re that organic mom? You’re a working mom, you must feel so guilty. You’re a stay-at-home mom, what a nice luxury, but you must be bored all the time. It seems the judgement begins when baby is still in the womb.

What is a baby shower?

Let’s take a look at the evolution of the baby shower. Prior to the 1950s, a baby shower was non-existent.  Instead, pregnancy and the birth of a baby were celebrated as a “coming-of-age” from woman to mother. After WWII, the baby shower that we know of began to surface. As consumerism sprouted, baby showers presented as a way to shower the expectant mother in gifts to lessen the financial burden of rearing an infant. This is how Americans view baby showers today.

3rd baby shower

Why you should have a third baby shower

In the U.S., baby showers are thrown to “shower the mother in gifts”. Gifts are expected, right? Well, not exactly. Things are slowly changing as minimalism is growing.  My journey in minimalism is to live life with less “stuff”.

A baby shower doesn’t have to be an elaborate celebration with food, grand cakes, professionally designed invitations, decorations galore or mountains of gifts. It can be small, simple, and full of love.

Shower each baby with love. Every baby deserves to be celebrated.

As a growing minimalist, I don’t need much for baby number three. However, I do want to celebrate his coming. I want to show him all the people who signed his baby book. I want to show him pictures of people guessing how big he was in mommy’s tummy and I want to show him that he was also loved, just like his two older brothers.

Having a third baby shower is a reason to party.

Coming from Hispanic heritage, we love to party. Any excuse for a party is relevant. Why not enjoy one good get-together filled with family and friends, good food, and lots of fun before baby comes? After all, you may not be “partying” for a while.

Modern alternatives, but still a baby shower

Recently, more and more families are throwing baby sprinkles, diaper parties, and frozen food parties as a way to simplify their lives while still being able to celebrate their subsequent children. But let’s face it, if you are a second, third, or fourth-time mom, you know that things expire (like car seats), your clothes that you still have may be of the wrong season for your second babe, diapers and wipes are always needed, and your gear may have broken or you gave it to another family member for their child.

Baby sprinkle– I dummed down baby shower. Usually close family and friends are invited gifts are minimal

Diaper party– A party where guests bring diapers only

Sip and see– A party after baby is born to see the new baby. Gifts may or may not be brought.

Frozen party– A party where guests bring pre-made dinners to be frozen to be cooked at a later date to make it easier.

Should I create a registry?

Yes, yes, and yes. Now, since gifts are not expected at the third shower, you can set it to private. I created a registry for a few reasons. Here’s why you should too:

When you create a registry, you are sent free items like diapers, bottle samples, and wipes! FREE!

Amazon has an awesome sweepstake going on right now. When you add $75 worth of Britax items, you are entered into a sweepstakes worth $2500!! This is going on until December 2017.

Also, if you or someone else purchases $1000 worth of items from your registry within 3 months, you get $100 worth of diapers and wipes! I added everything I will purchase in the next year. I plan on purchasing $1000 worth of new car seats (did you know that car seats expire?), breastfeeding supplies, and other necessities, so why not get $100 out of it.

In addition, when completing your registry, you receive 15% off items from your registry if you a Prime member.

This post may contain affiliate links which means that I will earn small compensation when you purchase or click. All earnings contribute to the maintenance of this blog and is greatly appreciated.

So have that third baby shower, mama. Register for free stuff. You and your baby deserve it.

 

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Unplanned pregnancy? Not happy about being pregnant? You are not alone.

The Purge: My start to living with less

Surviving Your First Trimester: Pregnancy Tips and Tricks

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5 reasons to use Cloth Diapers

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20 Comments

    1. Good for you mama! I hope you were celebrated and had a blast. You and every baby deserve to be celebrated in this time of motherhood. How far along are you?

  1. A baby shower is a lovely tradition that we follow in India and I have only one kid(as of now). Never thought of having a second baby shower if I get pregnant in future. Reading your post made me think why not.Lovely post with full of reasons to celebrate motherhood.

    1. What is the tradition for having baby showers in India? I’d love to know. I had a sprinkle for my second baby and it was nice to mingle with cousins and friends, aunts and uncles, and grandparents that we haven’t seen in a while.

  2. My sister in law is one of those that will not throw 2nd baby showers. I never understood, but then again I love celebrating. And I totally agree all babies regardless of birth order should be celebrated!!

    1. Thank you! Every baby should be celebrated. It’s doesn’t have to be about the gifts but it seems people cannot shake that part off.

  3. My baby shower was organized by my friends. Thanks for sharing your thoughts about organizing baby shower party. I will organize one if my friends will enter motherhood too.

    1. That’s great that you would do that for your friend. Would you do it for a friend that was going into motherhood for the second or third time?

    1. Have you come across this as well? I had no idea how it was against “party etiquette” but I suppose I’m not old fashioned when it comes to parties. 🙂

  4. I didn’t have a shower for my second because in my area, we typically have someone else throw the party for us and they didn’t believe in a second shower when my oldest was only 17 months older, albeit a different gender. However, I DO feel that every baby should be celebrated! IF I am ever brave enough to have a third, I would love to do a sip and see so that gifts are optional. Plus, then you can avoid rushes of guests coming to the house with one party.

    1. I agree. I do enjoy parties so maybe that’s why I don’t see any problem with subsequent showers. A sip and see works for many people I’ve heard and sounds like a good option.

  5. What a great post! I agree! Every child deserves to be celebrated! There are sooo many ways to have a “baby shower” these days. And what Momma doesn’t need a little love and attention during pregnancy?!?! Right? <3

  6. I would have LOVED to have a baby shower for my second and third babies and not at all for the gifts (because with our large families they were showered with gifts anyway) but exactly for the reasons you mentioned! To celebrate the new life and blessing that is each and every baby. And also, we love parties too! I don’t think baby showers should just be reserved for FTMs! Great post, thank you!

    1. Thank you! The frozen party is definitely practical and would be of so much help, especially for that initial newborn stage when everyone is figuring things out.

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